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LADY BUSINESS


a play in one act



Act I

Scene 1


INT. A room. A lone table, center stage in the light, surrounded by darkness. Table, filled with piles of books with three figures lounging in chairs around it. Tight on: three ladies. Awesome levels: high, looking pleased with themselves.

Renay: What do we want to tell the internets about Lady Business? "The group blog that is on the wrong side of the universe" perhaps? Roadblocked by health issues! Rebuffed by yard work accidents!

Jodie: Triumphing over adversity! Faster than lightning!

Renay: We have emerged from the darkness, stronger than ever and chomping at the bit to take on the patriarchy!

Ana: We have ponies and we WILL pet them!

Renay: And people who insult YA. What losers.

Ana: Yes, them too.

Renay: Make us mad and we're going to send Firebrand the Feminist Pony to your house?

Jodie: Speaking of that (sadly not the ponies) have you seen the Martin Amis quote doing the rounds?

Renay: Is it an angry making quote :|

Ana: Yep — it falls under "almost too pathetic to devote more than 3 minutes attention to", I believe. But then of course there's the fact that people listen :S And that his insults are very real.

Renay: Will I need several paperbags and also a rocket launcher?

Jodie: http://awfullybigblogadventure.blogspot.com/2011/02/martin-amis-response-from-childrens.html

Ana: Yes, Renay, I'm afraid you will :S

Renay: "I say, 'If I had a serious brain injury I might well write a children's book'"

"I SAY, 'IF I HAD A SERIOUS BRAIN INJURY I MIGHT WELL WRITE A CHILDREN'S BOOK''

Ana: Yep :S

Renay: I can already tell this is how it's going to go. Jodie will point something out, Ana will comment on it politely, and I will repeat the offensive commentary with capslocks and namecalling. WELCOME TO LADY BUSINESS, INTERNET!

Ana: It's not even all that surprising given his track record.

Jodie: We rely on you to use the capslock responsibly. ;)

Renay: By "responsibly" I hope you mean "in great quantities, aimed at assholes." I was thinking about that, though: how other group blogs have positioned themselves as professional. I hope no one here has these dreams. I am a Professional Disaster.

Jodie: I am so over professionalism.

Ana: No dreams! Well, other than lots of nerdy fun, that is. But no dreams that involve PRESSURE TO EXCEL. Personally I care more about the bookish conversation that is necessary to a literacy culture (like a quote you posted recently said) than about directly selling them or not.

Renay: I think that's what we're about, yeah? The conversation that has drifted away from us a bit. We want it back!

Ana: Yes. I want to use books as an excuse to TALK ABOUT STUFF. If that makes someone want to pick up the books in question, that's absolutely awesome. But it's not my main drive.

Renay: I want to use books as a gateway drug to pull people into porny fanfiction. Ana, your goals are way more pure than mine. :( *TERRIBLE PERSON*

Ana: That and the equivalent to Internet sleepovers we have talked about before. :P

Renay: We are going to have kick ass sleepovers. Everyone will want to come.

Jodie: And we will let them, because that is just how we are. *righteous*

Renay: But only if they bring snacks. And one day we will have LadyCon! Pajamas only!

Jodie: LadyCon, there will be the three of us in pajamas and I will be the only drunk one

Renay: hahaha

Ana: This actually brings me to what I want Lady Business to be all about: A DISCUSSION SPACE. We will critique books in ways that will likely involve racism, sexism, homophobia and so on, but we don't want the conversation to stop at those words. We don't want it to come down to "avoid book, nothing to see here" in people's minds.

Renay: That's the biggest problem with discussions! They stop at 101 level.

Ana: ...the question is, CAN THIS BE ACHIEVED? *suspense music*

Renay: Because you have to educate everyone.

Jodie: I sort of wonder if we need a manifesto that does the 101 stuff, possibly with links to posts like Unpack the Knapsack.

Ana: How do you move beyond a mental space where there are neatly labelled boxes such as "sexist" (don't read!) and "not sexist" (go buy!)? Is it in our hands at all?

Renay: It might be helpful, because honestly, I am disinterested in educating these days.

Ana: I suggest we pretend it is, even if it's not.

Renay: No one educated me Here's how I learned: 1) sit down, 2) shut up, 3) read and don't argue like a dumb, privileged white girl.

Ana: Sort of like a tab alongside our about page?

Renay: We definitely could!

Jodie: Yes, that would work.

Renay: I get upset just thinking about having to interact with people like this. Time for restorative Tom Hardy photo.



Renay: I want Lady Business to be fun, guys. That's why I quit before, it was just no fun.

Jodie: Me too, I'm really hoping there will be zero agro.

Ana: I think it WILL be fun.

Renay: Drama only when we choose to create it! By "we" I mean when I call out some cockrocket on one of my days, although you can both feel free to start some as well.

Ana: I normally do that in my cowardly way by writing entire rantish posts that only obliquely allude to the thing that got me going. I like your method better.

Renay: I like allusions. But I also like following links to watching people make asses of themselves.

Jodie: Sooooo addictive.

Laughter.

FADE OUT.

Intermission

Featuring thematically pertinent cat macro





Scene 2


INT. A room. Sleeping bags and blankets piled on the floor center stage in the light, surrounded by darkness. TV to the right, playing a movie, muted. Tight on: three ladies in pajamas. Awesome levels: even higher, sharing popcorn.

Renay: I can still support artists I like...while being disappointed with their choices...right?

Ana: Of course. Don't worry, we don't go ALL OR NOTHING on you.

Jodie: That would mean we would read and watch five things a year.

Ana: ...maybe three. :P

Jodie: Maybe just the Magic Roundabout on DVD.

Ana: lol

Jodie: We all like things with an element of sketch in them.

Renay: World, why can't you be perfect?

Ana: Indeed. But until it is, let us embrace nuance and complex, even contradictory emotions. There will be PLENTY OF THOSE at Lady Business.

Renay: It's going to be weird. I haven't read a book since July 2010.

Ana: But you still engage with stories, so it's all good.

Jodie: But Renay, don't you know only literature is worthwhile? ;P All that TV and fanfic is just a distraction. (I am going to ignore anyone who says that.)

Renay: Fanfic is awesome. I think everything we review we should go out and see if there is awesome fanfic for it.

Ana: And by literature you of course mean Literature. NOT EVERYTHING COUNTS >:(

Jodie: Oh yes how foolish of me ahahaha *trilling laughter*

Jodie: Seriously, no Sebastian Faulks show for Ana. There is this book The Stars Go Blue and I waaaaant fanfic for it.

Renay: Who is that?

Jodie: Caridad Ferrer. There's a gay best friend character and a band leader who wears awful Hawaiian shirts and I feel the Eames vibe around him.

Renay: oooh. *looks this up* Oh, YA and your freaking love triangles...

Jodie: And yet there is no getting together :( The drill leader is older, but I hoped after Raj stopped being in the drill team there might be something...but NO!

Ana: Does this happen in adult romance? I seriously have no idea (because I am IGNORANT, not because I'm Too Good for Romance)

Renay: What, constantly geometry?

Jodie: I don't read a lot, but it happens in chicklit.

Renay: I am just...I either want a pairing or poly.

Ana: Yeah, the triangle thing.

Renay: But no, poly people don't exist.

Ana: Poly would be awesome.

Renay: I AM NOT ACTUALLY REAL. Guys, I am a figment...of your imaginations...right now.

Ana: is there even a SINGLE BOOK OUT THERE where that's taken seriously?

Renay: I don't know, I don't think so :/ Not in YA, anyway, in YA it's definitely choose it or lose it.

Ana: And not introduced in the story to be demonised?

Jodie: There doesn't even seem to be a big movement that allows people to have been in love before, moved on, but still admit that love.

Ana: YES. That bugs the hell out of me. Which brings me back to the PARK BENCH SCENE >:( *cringes*

Renay: Maybe we should review 500 Days of Summer, too *g*

Ana: There was such a lovely passage that DID acknowledge that in Dash and Lily's Book of Dares. <3

Renay: I will brave my embarrassment trigger for a chance to rip it apart with you.

Ana: I would love to get even MORE sarcastic about that movie.

Jodie: Oh, the trailers for that were so *argh*

Renay: HOMEWORK: everyone watch 500 Days of Summer and Inception. *g* But! I will read stuff you guys want me to read, too. Don't let me flail all over you with MY suggestions.

Ana: Ursula Le Guin, Ursula Le Guin, Ursula Le Guin. You both have to read that series I mentioned the other day :P

Jodie: I have overcome my Le Guin fear now...

Ana: And I have rejoiced :P

Renay: MEANWHILE! Did we all agree to read Sisters Red?

Ana: We DID.

Jodie: Yes. *fears*

Renay: I am co-reviewing Across the Universe with Kailana and otherwise have zero frakking clue what my first post is going to be! #unprepared

Ana: Don't worry, plenty of time to decide :P

Renay: I like how we will eventually get started in, like, April. LADY BUSINESS: WORTH THE WAIT

The End


LADY BUSINESS




Date: 2011-03-04 11:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dastevens.blogspot.com
I'M SWOONING!!!! How ever am I going to be able to wait until April for more?!!!

Date: 2011-03-05 12:13 am (UTC)
renay: Pink pony with brown hair and wings on a yellow background bucking hind legs in the air. (Default)
From: [personal profile] renay
Next week! It will be like:

Monday: Ana
Wednesday: Jodie
Friday: Some Loud, Obnoxious Girl

Date: 2011-03-05 02:03 am (UTC)
owlmoose: (BMC - juno)
From: [personal profile] owlmoose
Hooray! I am so happy you've launched this blog. Really looking forward to thought-provoking posts and interesting conversation. :)

Renay: I can still support artists I like...while being disappointed with their choices...right?

Ana: Of course. Don't worry, we don't go ALL OR NOTHING on you.

Jodie: That would mean we would read and watch five things a year.

Ana: ...maybe three. :P


This is such a sensible and realistic attitude.

Date: 2011-03-05 05:50 pm (UTC)
renay: Pink pony with brown hair and wings on a yellow background bucking hind legs in the air. (Default)
From: [personal profile] renay
That whole discussion spun out of the Batman thing. I thought the tail end of it was important, since so much of the time when it comes to problematic literature, even liking something is seen as accepting the flaws, even if you specifically address them.

To get to media without problems, you have to partake of media with problems. It's like a ladder!

Date: 2011-03-05 05:53 am (UTC)
chrisa511: (Default)
From: [personal profile] chrisa511
OMG!!! I cannot tell you how excited I am about this XD

Date: 2011-03-05 05:48 pm (UTC)
renay: Pink pony with brown hair and wings on a yellow background bucking hind legs in the air. (Default)
From: [personal profile] renay
That's good because we are super excited. I like that we will be hidden over here in our tiny Dreamwidth corner, protected. *g*

Date: 2011-03-07 03:12 pm (UTC)
cypher: (bowstrings)
From: [personal profile] cypher
Oh, this looks like fun!

Re: the poly question, I can't think of any in YA (but I am sure you read more YA than I do, so no surprise), but I have run across it once or twice in adult spec fic. There is The Cage, by SM Stirling and Shirley Meier, which is kind of on the trashy fantasy spectrum, but it's trashy fantasy for someone like me, i.e., somebody who wants to see badass lesbians be victorious over douchebags. So I can't complain. And there is complicated relationship pining in there that is resolved with a group marriage among Our Heroes.

And I have been told that some of Melissa Scott's sci fi books have a poly relationship plot, but I haven't actually read those yet so I can't tell you much more than that. ^^;

Date: 2011-09-15 05:25 am (UTC)
renay: Pink pony with brown hair and wings on a yellow background bucking hind legs in the air. (Default)
From: [personal profile] renay
A zillion years later I am just finding this comment! Thank you for that first recommendation, I will check it out. It's kind of become Relevant to My Interests given recent upheavals in YA-land with regards to polyamory (or in other words, surprise, the establishment doesn't like us much).

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Queer lady geek Clare was raised by French wolves in the American South. more? » twitter icon webpage icon

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